It was finally open. Mission Space. The fastest, toughest, coolest, meanest ride Disney’s ever invented. How bad can it be?
For safety, you should be in good health and free from high blood pressure, heart, back or neck problems, motion sickness, or other conditions that could be aggravated by this adventure. Expectant mothers should not ride. – Disclaimer on the Disney web site for Mission Space
They say that stuff all the time. Don’t worry kids we’ll have fun.
I couldn’t wait. I wanted to experience the G-forces. I had always wanted to be an astronaut and now it was time to prove that Dad has the “Right Stuff”.
Here we go kids. I got separated from the kids and had to ride in a different capsule. I was with a family that didn’t speak any English and I didn’t speak the language they were speaking. It bothered me a little that our team wouldn’t be able to communicate in the depths of space, but somehow I’d make it work. I was in full Dad mode.
Why do they keep asking about motion sickness?
In we went. I had the navigators position which has the most important role in the flight (sure it does). We were loaded and ready. One last chance to escape. Why do they keep doing that?
Three, Two, One… WWWWOOOOOWWWW!!!!!
G-forces, shaking, noise. It all hit.
Up we went. Hey, I’m feeling a little uneasy here, can someone please turn down the air conditioning. (There are fans blowing on each side of your face. At first I thought it was annoying, but pretty soon I was very thankful for them.)
I’m not going to get in to the whole story, but suffice it to say, I was ready to get out of that contraption before it was ready to let me out.
I wouldn’t have made a very good astronaut.
I beat the kids out of the ride and found Mrs. Mom, and then headed straight for the nearest bathroom. Where I stayed for a while. Mrs. Mom being the thoughtful, loving wife that she is, had the kids run get Cokes or something while I recovered. The kids never knew that Dad was sick. You don’t find wives like that everywhere.
No, I didn’t make any messes. Almost, but not quite.
They next time we went to Epcot they had opened up the Green Line (it doesn’t do any of that spinning stuff). From now on I go in the Green Line and I’m proud of it. (I tell the kids the line is shorter. I don’t think they suspect.)